When I wrote “what am I losing, what am I taking away?”, it was pretty cathartic for me…and yet I knew that I was missing something. I thought that I was missing something that I would be losing. But when the comments started rolling in, I knew instantly that what was missing were the good-byes that
For leaders
What am I losing, what am I taking with me?
During this time of change for me, I have been reflecting on my transition. Change is the process; transition is the human, psychological stuff that happens when we go through change – whether that change is self-selected or imposed. All transitions have three stages: An ending, a letting go, a feeling of losing something The
Brave Job Searching?
Thanks for all your good wishes as I look for my perfect role. And to those of you who think it was a brave move, let’s reflect on that. Some years ago, I came to the realisation that you need to declare your needs, so that others can help you in your quest – whatever
Maverick Job Searching
It is time for a change, after 3 years in my current role. I’ve achieved great things in that role, and I am very proud of them (excuse my lack of modesty, but the recent Unlimited Human Potential M-Prize win and setting up the Coaching Network are just two examples). But now, it’s time to
Internal Motivation and Courageous Conversations part 2
In my last post on Courageous Conversations, I wrote about how we need to tap into people’s internal motivations in order to help them to flourish. What does that look like, then? How do you tap into their needs for autonomy, mastery and purpose? Well, here are some ideas that come from Craig Perrin and
Internal Motivation and Courageous Conversations
Over the years, there have been many theories about what motivates us human beings. Our perspective has shifted as the working world has changed. Way back when, when we were hunter-gatherers, survival was our major motivator. As we moved into the 1900s, Taylor posited that pay was the main motivator. In the 40s, Skinner argued
Employee Experience Counts
Some of you know that my previous job was all about talking to our employees, about their needs and desires, so that HR could provide them with the tools, processes and services that enable them to meet those needs. So when I came across a slide share that talked about the hopes, aspirations, fears, and concerns of employees,
Support and Challenge in Courageous Conversations
In the last post on Maturity and Courageous Conversations, I promised to write more about support vs challenge. Support is a crucial element of Courageously Responding. I’d argue that we can sometimes do too much of a good thing. You know, when a strength becomes a weakness. So support is good. And sometimes, it’s bad.
Maturity and Courageous Conversations
I wrote about the importance of maturity last week, on the part of the supervisor AND the supervisee. Assuming you have a good level of Emotional Intelligence, then the best way to achieve maturity is in the quality of the Courageous Conversations you have. That means both parties are stepping up into mature ways of
Emotional Maturity in the Supervisor/Supervisee relationship
What’s the connection between the actions that supervisors can take to avoid game-playing, and the actions that supervisees can take? It’s all about maturity. And by that, I don’t mean being a stuffy, serious adult the whole time – there is definitely room for play (as opposed to game-playing) in the workplace. What I mean
The antidote to power-play: supervisees, it’s your turn
We addressed the actions that supervisors can take to move out of game-playing. How about the supervisee? It takes two to make a relationship work, especially if you aspire to it feeling more like a partnership that a dictatorship. Managing upwards can seem counter-cultural, but there’s a real need for both parties to take responsibility
The antidote to power-play? Supervisors, listen up
We’ve discussed how easy it is for the supervisor/supervisee relationship to be consciously or sub-consciously ambushed by power play. Even if the supervisor isn’t intentionally wielding that power, there can still be a little voice in the supervisee’s head saying that “he/she is more senior than me, therefore has the power to make or break
Games that supervisors play
Last week, we started to explore the power dynamics that can get in the way of a successful supervisor/supervisee relationships if we don’t pay attention to them. We also explored the games that supervisees play in an attempt to balance the power. Catch up here: The power dynamics of the supervisor/ee relationship Games that supervisees play to
Games that supervisees play to regain their power
Let’s talk about the games that (some) supervisees play as a way to cope with the imbalance of power. See if any of these sound familar. I know I have played one or more of these cards in my time, albeit subconsciously (I’m having a hard time admitting that I have ever done any of these
The power dynamics in supervisor/supervisee relationships
I write a lot about the power of conversation. So let’s talk about something that can get in the way of those courageous conversations . That is the power dynamic between a supervisor and supervisee. First off, there’s the power vested in the supervisor, purely because of their rank – and they can pull rank at
If at first you don’t succeed…
I wish I had a pound for every time I have heard this story…I’ve just posted a blog, and someone sends me an email with a question. It is seldom a question asked in front of the group, in the comments box, but rather separately in this 1-1 email. These usually start with…I’ve tried what you
