Love in Coaching – Part Seven

Being Authentic in How We Present Ourselves, with Love

An aspect I’ve been contemplating lately is whether to explicitly include love in my coaching biography and marketing materials.  Not as a niche, like a love coach or relationship coach might do, but as a way of being.

There’s something powerfully authentic about stating upfront that love is central to my coaching approach. This transparency serves several purposes:

• It allows potential clients and organisations to self-select based on resonance with this approach
• It signals from the outset that I view coaching as fundamentally relational rather than merely technical
• It establishes congruence between my values and how I present myself professionally
• It opens space for conversations about love before coaching even begins

Of course, this approach comes with risks. Some potential clients might be put off by language that seems too “soft” or unfamiliar in professional contexts. Organisations seeking purely skills-focused coaching might look elsewhere. But as I read somewhere recently, “No one asks for love in their coaching, but it’s a human need” (sorry for the lack of attribution – I will put it right if anyone knows where I might have come across that).

But I’m beginning to wonder whether these aren’t features rather than bugs. By being explicit about love’s significance to my practice, I might attract clients and organisations who are already open to deeper relational work, while creating a natural filter for those who would find my approach uncomfortable.

I’d be curious to hear from other coaches: Have you included love explicitly in your professional biography? What responses have you received? What language have you found most effective?

A personal reflection

I’ll be honest—I’m still finding my way with these conversations. While I’ve had some productive discussions with coaching stakeholders about the relational dimensions of coaching, explicitly discussing love with them is new territory for me. I feel vulnerability when contemplating these conversations, aware of the risk of misunderstanding or dismissal. Or of being seen as “witchy” and “woo woo”! I have started to use the sign-off With Love at the end of some of my emails, but I stop myself frequently, wondering how I will be perceived.

I suspect that the resistance I anticipate might sometimes be more in my imagination than reality. Many coaching custodians may already sense the limitations of purely technical approaches. They’ve likely observed the difference that relationship quality makes to coaching outcomes, even if they haven’t named it as love.

My intention moving forward is to trust that coaching stakeholders have their own wisdom about what makes coaching effective. I don’t need to convince them about love’s importance—I can create conditions where they might discover its essential role for themselves through reflection on their own experience and observations. This feels both more authentic to coaching principles and more likely to create genuine understanding

Next time, we’ll look at becoming unencumbered, unfiltered, unleashed in our display of agape love.